flow

It's kinda funny, I've noticed some people are very sensitive to change, they see every little one, + others (ahem, me) are almost so fluid with change that they barely see all the little ones that lead into big ones.

"Adaptable" is a word that gets used to describe me a lot. I look at like I float so seamlessly with the river that I'm just enjoying the flow into my big ocean destination.

So when the ocean is my focus, I have to come up for air here + there to appreciate the change in where I am along the way. I'm loving the feel of the water swirling around me too much to note the new bend in the river if I don't make myself look.

If you're like me, other people help you take a breath + see your progress. They take your hand + show you what to marvel at, what's inspiring in your own life, how monumental even the little swirling pools along the way can be.

"How does it feel to be doing that new big thing?"

"You seem so much happier now!"

"I'm stoked for you!"

"That's amazing, you're amazing..."

"You've come so far, you're doing so great."

When I signed up for my first challenge group, my eye was on the ocean of stabilizing + strengthening a shoulder that had been through two major surgeries, a lot of painful therapy, + consistently dislocated doing the most random, normal things (+ that hurt so bad all the time, radiating between the point where I first tore it + my elbow, just encompassing my whole upper arm). I wasn't convinced the pain would stop completely, but I knew I could at least get the dislocations under control to some degree + become strong.

I threw myself into PiYo + drinking my Shakeology every single day. I didn't even wait for my challenge group to start, + then when it did it just took my determination to the next level with the accountability.

It took me a little while to notice that my arm/shoulder/elbow almost never hurt anymore. One of our assignments was a kind of check-in of non-scale victories, so I did a little personal audit + was all "Feeling more confident...oh hey...I'm not in pain all the time...!"

It took me even longer to realize I was losing weight + inches + there was tone that wasn't there before.

It helped that I temporarily moved in with my parents to help them with some stuff, so my mom (always mom, ya know? Moms just notice that stuff...you're either too skinny or they're "gently" suggesting some healthy changes...) was around to be like "Dang, look at you."

+ then I started coming up for air more, kept my head out of the water to keep an eye out for dips + swirls + bends on this journey. I was impressed when I lost 5lbs. I woke up + saw abs in the mirror one day. I saw my jeans were a lot looser in the waist + a little more snug in the glute department (hello). + then 10lbs down. + then I put these pictures together on Instagram the other day:

I wasn't sure anyone else would really see the difference...but so many did, + not just the half of my head missing hair now. I got a bunch of texts + messages all with "holy cow" sentiments.

I realized when you go with the flow too much, when you don't come up for air often enough, you also don't get to feel the sun on your face a great deal.

+ we all know we need that vitamin D.

This is why I love doing things the way we do with our teams + groups + coaching with Beachbody. I don't just get to help others find their flow, but I get to enjoy mine a little more too.

I love getting to share the sunlight.

It's just too lovely not to.